There are so many eligible candidates for 2011�s April Fools Awards that it's difficult to choose the most worthy but I have narrowed down the best by limiting them to the most current in their various fields.
POLITICS:
When it comes to fools, President Barack Hussein Obama is the leader of the pack and most deserving by far. His most recent excursions into foolery include announcing he was dispatching covert CIA spy teams to Libya, admitting he didn't want to deport illegal aliens and saying, "We want them to succeed," and secretly accepting an award for the absence of secrecy in his administration.
Someone in our scholarly leader's coterie should explain to Obama the meanings of "covert," "illegal," and transparency.
Close runner-up for political fool of the year is Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid's who has called for continued federal funding of the "cowboy poetry festival" when the nation is broke.
ENTERTAINMENT:
Clear stand-out for entertainment's fool prize is Charlie Sheen, but not for his antics on and off Twitter nor for his planned and allegedly fully-booked "Charlie Sheen's: Violent Torpedo of Truth/Defeat Is Not an Option tour. After all, Charlie is Charlie and, if nothing else, his antics have been amusing, in a way, even if they are suggestive of lunacy, and his tour promises to be a circus.
Charlie is a fool for screwing with his job on "Two and a Half Men," for which he was raking in millions per episode, and especially for thinking he could get away with verbally crossing its creator-producer, Chuck Lorre, with anti-Semitic remarks.
Lunacy and a lot more are forgivable nowadays, anti-Semitism not so much.
Entertainment runner-up? Easily Bill Maher due to that liberal's so very illiberal, intemperate, hypocritical slurs hurled at women, specifically, former Governor Sarah Palin and Rep. Michelle Bachmann. He has called them "two bimbos," has called Palin "a t*at," and Bachmann a "c*nt," not that the National Organization for Women cared.
SPORTS:
Mediocre Spanish tennis player, David Ferrer, knew he was losing his match against American Mardy Fish in the SONY Ericsson Open quarter final when an infant apparently interrupted his focus on losing by doing what infants do, crying, loudly.
Not known for having much class on or off the court, the 29 year old reacted as any tennis has-been-who-never-was loser might. He smacked the ball into the stands, toward the infant. True to form, he missed, went on to lose the point, the match, and four straight games. He no doubt went home meditating on the boos he richly deserved and on the meaning of love in and outside the game of tennis.
See Ferrer's class act here: http://bit.ly/hSpbxY
Sports runner-up: Fraudulent home run king of baseball, Barry Bonds. I've already spent too much time on him, though: http://www.genelalor.com/blog1/?p=4014
LAW ENFORCEMENT:
Anyone who has ever been a 12 year old boy or who has ever known one realizes they are a unique species, semi-civilized and brimming with unrequited testosterone. Staten Island's own Osman Daramy sounds more unrequited than most as well as a future occupant of Rikers Island if not Sing Sing.
With a history of harassment and violence, Daramy allegedly attacked, punched, and kicked a female student outside his Berta Dreyfus Intermediate School and was arrested and charged with aggravated harassment in addition to a more heinous crime for, allegedly, unsuccessfully ripping off her hijab.
Because the boy disrespected her Muslim faith by disrespecting her traditional head scarf, he was charged with a hate crime, America's (but not Islam's) new creation of a thought crime designed by our Thought Police to punish what society believes Daramy was thinking when he assaulted the girl.
On the basis of that charge, the NYPD-and society-are hereby awarded the title of 2011 Law Enforcement April Fools. Daramy may indeed end up on "America's Most Wanted" but he is 12 years old and what was traversing his or anyone else's brain when they flip out is best reserved for mind readers than for cops or courts.
Runners-up are too numerous to list.
Fools rush in where angels fear to tread. April Fools such as Barack Obama, Harry Reid, Charlie Sheen, Bill Maher, David Ferrer, Barry Bonds, and the NYPD rush in when propriety, honesty, decency, and common sense are tossed. Give me good, old fashioned circus clowns anyday!
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